[Har Mar Superstar] In the not-too-distant future Next Sunday, AD There was a guy named Jonah Not too different from you or me He worked at Gizmonic Institute Just another mug in a yellow jumpsuit [Jonah] Hello? Hello! What the heck? [Har Mar Superstar] A distress call came in for him at half-past noon That's when an evil woman trapped him on the dark side of the moon [Kinga] I'll send him cheesy movies The worst I can find (la la la) He'll have to sit and watch them all And we'll monitor his mind (la la la) [Har Mar Superstar] Now keep in mind that Jonah can't control When the movies begin or end So he'll have to keep his sanity With the help of his robot friends Robot Roll Call Cambot! Gypsy! Tom Servo! Crooooow! If you're wondering how he eats and breathes And other science facts (la la la) Then repeat to yourself, "It's just a show I should really just relax" For Mystery Science Theater 3000!