Cat:
"I've been so worried I haven't buffed my shoes in my two days."
Rimmer:
"Kryten, kindly get to the point before I jam your nose between your cheeks and make it the filling of a buttock sandwich."
Rimmer:
"No look, I'm you from the future. I've come to warn you that in 3 million years you'll be dead!"
Rimmer:
"My brain's rebelled. It just won't accept nice things happening to me."
Cat:
"Do you realize that with all this rescue stuff, I haven't had time to perm my leg hairs!"
Rimmer:
"I used to be in the Samaritans."
Lister:
"I know. For one morning."
Rimmer:
"I couldn't take any more."
Lister:
"I don't blame you. You spoke to five people and they all committed suicide. I wouldn't mind, but one was a wrong number!"
Rimmer:
"When the going gets tough, the tough go have a little cry in the corner."
Rimmer:
"So let me get this straight. You want to fly on a magic carpet to see the King of the Potato People and plead with him for your freedom, and you're telling me you're completely sane?"
Kryten:
"Yes, sir I am a robot"
lister:
"Im going out the same way I came in, screaming and kicking"
Rimmer:
"Smeg off dog-food-face!"
Kryten:
"*holding up a tampon* Go ahead try it on I want to see what it looks like!"
Rimmer:
"Step up to red alert."
Kryten:
"Sir, are you absolutely sure? It does mean changing the bulb."
Rimmer:
"What is there that one could possibly loathe about me?"
Kryten:
"Would you like a list sir?"
Lister:
"Rimmer, can't you see that the story is not gripping me? I'm in a state of nongripness. I'm completely smegging ungripped. Shut the smeg up!"
Kryten:
"Mr Rimmer would be effectively dead."
Cat:
"Hey! Things are looking up already."
Holly:
"And the moral of the story is , appreciate what you've got because basically I'm fantastic."
Rimmer:
"Well, I would have thought it was obvious. Two people unable to contain their desires had an illicit liason. A liason that an unforgiving society would not accept, and you were the fruit of their forbidden passion. You're forbidden passion fruit."
Rimmer:
"Wrong, wrong, absolutely brimming over with wrongability"
Ace Rimmer:
"Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast"
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