Uncle Phil:
"I got a few questions for you. When you've got this confession from these two young men, do they have a lawyer present? No, because I'm their lawyer. Did you notify their parents? No, because we're their parents. So Officer, don't tell us to wait and don't tell us to sit down. Just open that damn cell and let these two boys out of there or I'm gonna tie this place up with so much litigation that YOUR GRANDCHILDREN ARE GONNA NEED LAWYERS!"
Hilary:
"Is he in there?"
Will:
"No. the coast is CLEEEEAAAAR!!!"
Will and Uncle Phil:
"Will: Come on Uncle Phil, you're gonna ruin my rep.
Uncle Phil: You're only 17, you don't have a rep yet."
Uncle Phil:
"YOU DID WHAT?! Are you out of your horny little adolescent minds?!"
Carlton:
"I know I am, Dad."
Will Smith:
"Yo G
-Will Smith"
Carlton:
"YOU POPPED BRUCE!
-Carlton"
Carlton and Will:
"Carlton: Remember, we must never fear to negotiate, but never negotiate out of fear.
Will: Remember, Momma said knock you out! LLCoolJ
-Carlton and Will"
Will:
"It's your world squirrel, I'm just trying to get a nut
-Will"
Will and Kathleen:
"Kathleen: If you say "breath mints" one more time i'm gonna scream!
Will: Breath mints...breath mints...breath mints, breath mints, BREATH MINTS!!!
(Kathleen Screams)
Will: ...And your momma sucks breath mints too!!
-Will and Kathleen"
Will and Kathleen:
"Kathleen: I thought you liked doing things for me?
Will: I did 'til you ate all my breath mints
-Will and Kathleen"
Will- singing whilst stuck in the basement with some girl:
"I'm stuck in a basement, sittin' on a tricycle, girl gettin' on my nerves.....all this time I thought she was fine- didn't know that her body weren't hers
-Will- singing whilst stuck in the basement with some girl"
Will:
"Girrrl, your feet must be tired 'coz you've been running through my mind all day, COME HERE!
-Will"
Carlton:
"Jump on it!
-Carlton"
Hiliary and Ashley:
"(Hiliary) Long distance relationships don't usually last, I mean look at The Little Mermaid. She was under the sea and he was on land.
(Ashley) Yeah, but they ended up together.
(Hiliary) Yeah! With the help of a lobster, HELLO! Do you know a lobster?
-Hiliary and Ashley"
Vivian:
"*at the hospital when Vivian is giving birth*
PHILIIIIIIP!! PHILIIIIP!!"
Phil:
"VIVIAN!"
Vivian:
"PHILLIP!"
Phil:
"VIVIAN!"
Will:
"WILMA!!!"
Phil:
"Oh, shut up!"
Ashley:
"Word Up! This is gonna be cold stupid on the serious tip.
-Ashley"
Will:
"(After Uncle Phil punches Dr. Hoover) "THAT'S IT, UNCLE PHIL! YOU'RE GROUNDED!"
-Will"
Hilary:
"Daddy, I need $300.
-Hilary"
Carlton:
"Will, check out the talent! She's cool, she's hot, she's..."
Will:
"Your baby sister, man!"
Carlton:
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"
Jazz:
"I seen him do a lot of chewin' but I ain't never seen him spit nothin' out.
-Jazz"
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