Florida Orange Juice commercial, 1992
Quote O' Matic
Johnny:
"[Johnny walks to the apartment rooftop] I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshit! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark."
Mark:
"Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?"
Johnny:
"I have a problem with Lisa. She says that I hit her."
Mark:
"What? Did you?"
Johnny:
"[sits down] No, it's not true. Don't even ask. What's new with you?"
Mark:
"I'm just sitting up here thinking, you know. I got a question for you."
Johnny:
"Yeah?"
Mark:
"You think girls like to cheat like guys do?"
Johnny:
"What makes you say that?"
Mark:
"[gets up] I don't know. I don't know. I'm just... I'm just thinking."
Johnny:
"I don't have to worry about that because Lisa is loyal to me."
Mark:
"Yeah, man, you'll never know. People are very strange these days. I used to know a girl; she had a dozen guys. One of them found out about it... beat her up so bad she ended up at a hospital on Guerrero Street."
Johnny:
"Ha ha ha. What a story, Mark. [gets up]"
Mark:
"Yeah, you can say that again."
Johnny:
"I'm so happy I have you as my best friend, and I love Lisa so much."
Mark:
"Yeah, man. Yeah, you are very lucky."
Johnny:
"Well, maybe you should have a girl, Mark."
Mark:
"[pauses, then walks forward] Yeah. Yeah, maybe you're right. Maybe I have one already. I don't know yet."
Johnny:
"Well, what happened? Remember Betty? That's her name?"
Mark:
"Betty? Yeah. Yeah, we don't see each other anymore. You know, she wasn't any good in bed. She was beautiful, but we had too many arguments."
Johnny:
"That's too bad. My Lisa's great whenever I get it."
Mark:
"[sits down] Oh man, I just can't figure women out. Sometimes they're just too smart. Sometimes they're just flat-out stupid. Other times they're just evil."
Johnny:
"It seems to me that you're the expert, Mark. [sits down]"
Mark:
"No. Definitely not an expert, Johnny."
Added By: Clint_Olson
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